First Trimester Recap
Alright so here we are… first trimester down and two to go! Here’s a little recap of those first few months.
After losing our sweet girl in December 2018 we decided to first and foremost move forward with doing an egg retrieval and freezing my eggs. I wanted to be pregnant again ASAP after loosing her but my body simply wasn’t ready (I shared in March that I had a very early or ‘chemical’ miscarriage). After the first retrieval was completed it was determined there were only that were healthy enough to make it to the testing/freezing stage. I was definitely disappointed. The testing takes about two weeks so we decided to go ahead with another round of retrieval while we waited for those results. Welp, we ended up with a small basketball team of healthy embryos. Go me! 😆 I am very grateful for this because it really took the pressure the off. I felt like I had failed when I lost my daughter so to have these type of results really took the weight off my shoulders. I don’t want to just graze over the retrieval process and act like it was no biggy. It was HARD. A lot of medications. A lot of appointments. Two times under anesthesia… Holy process. But I did it. Well WE did it because it was a lot of dedication from my husband and my whole family who had to help fill in the gaps with Greyson for me.
We went forward with the embryo transfer in June and found out it was successful before we left for Las Vegas for Michael’s birthday. Best present ever. I REALLY wanted to move forward with one of the tested embryos because it can help lower (not eliminate) the possibility of miscarriage. I was willing and wanting to try everything in my power to not feel that type of pain again.
I will say that pregnancy after loss is A LOT harder that I could have ever prepared myself for. I kept doubting it was accurate. I started with “well lets wait and see what the blood test shows”… pregnant. “well lets wait and see what the ultrasound shows”… pregnant. I just kept doubting that it was true. I had two ultrasounds before we left for France and I was definitely pregnant and everything was looking great.
Once we returned I went in for another ultrasound and the subchorionic hematoma was found. I was devastated. I immediately thought I was going to lose another baby. After six days I was going crazy and called the doctor and asked to come in and check on the baby. That ultrasound showed that the hematoma had grown THREE TIMES as big in those six days. Immediate panic. My doctors believed that this was due to the large amounts of blood thinners I take. It was decided to cut down on my Lovenox and begin strict bedrest. No lifting- at all. This meant someone had to be with Grey and I at all times. Once again our nanny and family win all the gold stars. I felt so useless and horrible but could not risk the baby. I went back for weekly appointments every Tuesday and watched, slowly but surely, the hematoma get smaller and smaller while the baby got bigger and bigger ❤️!
As of this moment I am off bedrest but still not cleared for workouts. I can lift Grey though. WOO HOO! Quick little shoutout to Doc Horn for attending every single ultrasound these past few months. I cry at every appointment out of fear so he always comes no matter how crazy his day or schedule is.
Answering some of the questions you guys sent me…
-Do you still go to acupuncture?
I do! I’ve been going weekly to help with the Hematoma and I feel like it really made a difference. I will continue to go, probably twice a month, to help with sleep and anxiety.
-Did you have morning sickness?
With all three of my pregnancies I never actually got sick. I would just experience horrible nausea. This go was the same however the nausea was so bad around dinnertime I usually couldn’t eat much. Breakfast and lunch were my best meals!
-Did you use one of your frozen embryos?
Yup! I explained that whole process above.
-How do you deal with the anxiety of being pregnant after loss?
It’s HARD. My doctors have been ridiculously understanding and allow me to go in for weekly ultrasounds to check on my little bebe. I also have been doing the acupuncture, as I mentioned, and am not using my home doppler for little check ins.
-Do you workout pregnant?
Normally, yes. This pregnancy I have not been cleared yet. I am hoping that next week I’ll be cleared for prenatal yoga!
-When are you due?
This is a tricky one 😆 So obviously I have a due date but I am trying not to focus too hard on that exact date because I will definitely have to deliver early since I am so high risk. I am hoping to cook this babe till mid February but will definitely have to play it by ear towards the end.
-Will you find out the gender?
Uh YES. We did the blood test and the results are back. I am just waiting for now. I have ZERO preference since I am just hoping and praying for a healthy baby.
-Is it just one baby?
Yes. I am already ridiculously high risk so I am not medically cleared for multiples. Plus my mom would have a stroke 😆