First off I had a lot of questions about my emergency surgery from Friday. I will try to do a quick explanation. When I was 8months pregnant I was diagnosed with May-Thurner Syndrome. The weight of the baby blocked blood flow in the major vein of my left leg and I ended up with an 18in blood clot. They delivered the baby, broke up the clot in my leg, and placed permanent stents to keep the blood flowing properly in my leg. I went in to see my doctor Friday because I had leg pain, which is a big red flag for someone like me. They did an ultrasound to check on the stents and discovered a large clot that was blocking flow in all of the stents. Completely occluded. I was told I needed surgery THAT day. Talk about overwhelming. My family rallied, per usual, a plan was made and into surgery I went. The clot was cleaned from the stents and two more stents were placed. I stayed in the hospital over the weekend for pain management… the stents hurt =/. So thats that.
Why did this happen? The perfect storm. Two miscarriages in three months (so hormones galore), long flight, decreased activity (I’ve been down after the miscarriages), and dehydration.
What now? We’ve increased my blood thinners (which is an injection so that basically sucks for me but not having a leg would suck more). Follow up in month. The good fight to keep myself clot free continues.
(Real quick. When I found out this news on Friday I was genuinely, to my core, terrified. I have major PTSD surrounding this issue, clots can kill people, and I came close last time to not making it. Very close. So I appreciate the outpouring support and prayers more than I can express.)
Alright so since sharing is my go to therapy move I am here with more updates in order to get a healthy chunky baby Horn here. Michael and I, after a lot of discussions with each other and our doctors, have decided to move forward with freezing another batch of embryos. There are a lot of reasons that went into this and it was not something we just woke up and thought we should do.
-I am 31 (I know that is ‘young’) but unfortunately with fertility issues it isn’t. Especially if we want more than two children.
-I think going this route will also help take some stress off of my shoulders as far as the pressure I am currently feeling (from myself) to get pregnant as soon as possible.
-It is a forced break from trying to get pregnant again right away. Granted the break comes with ridiculous amounts of medications and changes to my poor exhausted body but to me, its a break.
-After the retrieval is completed we will have them genetically tested. This will help decrease the chances of miscarriage. NOT eliminate by any means but decrease.
This process takes months. A month to get my body ready for the retrieval itself. Then weeks to wait to see how many embryos are viable and passed the genetic screening. Then a month to get my body prepared for a transfer… IF WE DECIDE to do it that soon.
I am sharing this so openly because there is NOTHING SHAMEFUL about fertility issues. Once again for the people in the back… there is NOTHING SHAMEFUL about the fact that I am taking this route. I am married to the love of my life. We have a beautiful life, a perfect son, and have excepted that this is just our current path.
Another note I would like to make is we are not doing this for gender purposes. If we go ahead with transferring a frozen embryo I will request not to know the gender and go purely off of ‘best’ or ‘healthiest’ tested embryo. This is not a battle for a certain gender. This is me wanting a HEALTHY full-term baby… boy or girl.
So for now we do nothing, really. It’s a waiting game until my body is ready. Hoping to get things started the end of this month and go from there. These are decisions and choices that my husband and I have made together and I am choosing to share those with you.
Last but not least the financial aspect. I have covered this topic before and will say it again. YES we are grateful that we are able to do this because it is financially a large undertaking. However, our pain is real. Our heartbreak is genuine and there is no amount that can change that. So once again, pointing out that we are “able to do this” is not something we need to hear or take for granted.